Feelings follow behaviour.

We often let our emotions rule our lives, one minute we sit idly and the next we ready to pounce or become defensive and attack anyone and everyone that seems like a threat to us. The question is, are we able to rule or control our emotions in this demanding environment. It is said that females’ emotions can be affected by the smallest of things returning the biggest explosions, for example an unhelpful shop assistant with attitude will hit the last nerve of some women.

Many women go through Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS) and Menopause and men are usually at the receiving end of the emotional feeling which sometimes causes outbursts and mood swings as well as irritability, depression and anxiety. However emotional intelligence is needed to cope with the demands of a corporate and capitalist environment we operate in. It’s about being “heart smart”, emotional intelligence helps one build strong relationships, succeed at work, and achieve ones goals.  Do feelings follow behaviour? Or does behaviour follow feelings? I tend to side with the latter. Under normal circumstances it is the thought process and the feeling that is evoked that brings about the behaviour we display. We need to be more emotionally intelligent so that we are not controlled by our feelings.

A senseless murder in the first degree

I am shocked by the news that a family friend’s neighbour in Thornton was butchered in his backyard while taking the bin out this past Friday morning at about 7am. The couple in their late 70’s was senselessly attacked and the old man was stabbed 17 times repeatedly. The attackers then entered the house and attacked the wife. She was hit with a mallet repeatedly and lost consciousness.  She woke up a few hours later and hit the panic button for the security company to help her.  A few minutes later the police and ambulance arrived and she was transported to hospital. It is said that she was so badly hurt and her own best friend could not even recognize her. The robbers fled with the house keys, car keys and cellphones.

Life is so precious, life is delicate and life is a gift from the Almighty. Taking a person’s life is a heartless and cruel thing to do. These senior citizens were enjoying their peaceful golden years hoping that one day they will pass away silently and peacefully. It is sad that death came literally as a thief in the night. 

We live behind tall walls, top end alarm systems and remote controlled gates fearing for our safety. It is sad how we have become prisoners in our own homes. Criminals are brothers, sisters, children, cousins, friends etc. We should report perpetrators and not allow people to get away with murder. 

Zulu girls take pride in their virginity

Annually in Kwazulu Natal there is a festival in which girls rejoice in their virginity and pledge that they will remain virgins until marriage. These girls are not shy and ashamed to appear on television and some can even be in their late twenties or early thirties.

If I would walk into a lecture room at any University today and ask all the girls and boys who are still virgins to put up their hands they will be shy and some will lift them up slowly.  Our society has corrupted us in such a negative way, that people perceive virginity as something not hip and as a backward thing.  People disrespect virgins and breakout in laughter if a mature person speaks of their virginity.

How dare we judge people who have respected their bodies and kept the Lords commandments.  Science tells us that the use of a condoms can’t provide absolute protection against STD’s, HIV/AIDS and unwanted pregnancy. On the other hand God’s guidance of abstinence and faithfulness in marriage guarantees absolute protection.

We need to change our lifestyles and encourage the youth to abstain. If things continue at the rate they are right now with 13 year olds having sex and making videos the future looks bleak for the next generation. If we continue at this rate we will come to a point where sleeping with all the men or women in town is a norm and not immoral.

It is better to practice a little than talk a lot.

Talking, complaining, shouting and ensuring that your point being heard is important. At times though talking a lot does not make sense without any action. The idiom ‘action speaks louder than words’ is important in the context of us practicing what we preach.

We are quick to judge others when they do wrong. We always want to correct other people by seeing the saw dust in their eyes whereas we have a log in ours. There are people who always want to do the talking and never the listening. Doing all the talking and not taking any action is pointless, because there is nothing we achieve except mumbling and moaning.  Our goals and dreams are sometimes stalled because we procrastinate and do not take action to fulfill them.

Sometimes parents see wrong doings in other children except their own. Some parents are quick to reprimand other children and tell them how useless they are, and don’t do the same to their children.  We should always do some introspection before we start blasting off and yapping away.

We should be known by our deeds and action and not just by our words. 

Is the DA doing better than the ANC in terms of service delivery?

 

The lack of access to proper sanitation and water is a problem across the country. It is important to note the government has made significant strides in assisting people to have access to these basic rights, but have not done enough.

I have been disappointed in the Eastern Cape administration in the corrupt and uncaring way it has been run in the past 17 years. There have been some strides in access to electricity and water, but sanitation is a big issue and basic service delivery is a value. The Eastern Cape is largely rural and therefore in some towns does not have access to pipelines for sewerage. However in towns like Grahamstown, there should be proper sanitation facilities, but the bucket system is still being used in some parts of the location and R 9million was unaccounted for the 2010 budget. This R9million could have been used to build proper toilets.

The DA however also paints a picture that it runs the City of Cape Town and the Western Cape perfectly and this is far from being true. Cape Town was voted the number one City in the Western Cape with the best mayor etc and the best service delivery record. A beautiful picture has been painted of Cape Town as if everything is hunky-dory.

This is far from the truth.

The protesters from the Social Justice Coalition gave the DA-controlled city until May 18 - the day of the local government elections - to produce an implementation plan and budget for basic sanitation in Khayelitsha. A mother of three children, Zukiswa Qezo, 39, from RR section in Khayelitsha, said to the Sowetan she used a toilet next to the N2 highway for 12 years. "Then last year they put a toilet seat with a 10 litre bucket under it outside my place. It is no good. A girl was gang-raped last week when she used her bucket toilet at night. This system is not safe. We want our dignity - one flushing toilet for every family," Qezo told Sowetan.Her husband told the crowd how he was stabbed under the eye by three criminals at the toilet near the highway last year.

Abahlali Basemjondolo said over 500,000 people in Cape Town's townships do not have basic sanitation. They said the city continued to provide sanitation that did not meet basic standards - such as bucket toilets, pit toilets without ventilation and building toilets in one part of an informal settlement only.

Two years ago the ID leader Patricia De Lille said government was to blame for the continued existence of bucket toilets as service delivery was not prioritized, the funny thing is that she has joined the same government she recently critised.

A report by West Cape News said most of the sanitation technologies provided to informal settlements in Cape Town do not meet the standards of basic sanitation. This is either due to the higher household: toilet ratios, the technology itself, the condition and location of the sanitation infrastructure, or the way in which it is serviced.

My take on this is that politicians are all the same, no party is better than the other. The DA might accuse the ANC of not delivering basic services, but Cape Town has also had service delivery protests as seen in other provinces.